Nov 23, 2010

Hate to Hate



Hate and hatred. Benci dan kebencian.

Is it easy to hate a person, or group of peps?

Nope. Its not easy at all. I dont easily hate pep or get the hang of it. Lagi pun sape suka rasa benci tu. 



Why I hate?

I dont simply hate peps whenever i felt abused or treated unfairly. Yeah some may easily pisses me off,  but not that easy to turn it to something to hate for. Unless the act is in such a way that jeopardizing  my future success or adversely affect my personal development and contributed to my low self-esteem and self-worth.

I hate pep who betray my trust and faith I once place in them.

I hate pep who broke my heart, they knew it but never apology.  

I hate the bastard which  i labelled as a loser a.k.a pengecut, whom step in my life with promises but then step out silently without any reason or excuses whatsoever. I am not the kind who stay in grief for to long. Truth are easy to understand once told. It will be a misery at first.. but by the end of the day, it will set u free, much easier to brush it off and moved on. So please be true. To hear a simple "You are just not my type!" is much more better than just missing, or hiding, or ignoring.  



Why I hate to hate?

I hate to hate because when it start, it will harbor a tremendous amount of anger out of me. Not only against them but  to my ownself as well. Isn't that torturing.

When i hate, i will start to ignore and avoid the person.. pretend that they never exist. I will easily heighten by their presence and anything relate to them, and  easily agitated whenever the tot of them come to my mind. 

Sometimes when i felt so much heighten by the hatred, I shows antagonistic and dogmatic attitude. Hostile, rude, sarcastic, ignorant, cold, distant, offensive etc etc...

I assure you that it is hard to hate peps without hurting your ownself.The more you try.. the harder it become. The more you hate.. the more you suffer.

"Hate is too great a burden to bear. It injures the hater more than it injures the hated."

Yes and very obvious, when we hate someone so much we will never feel content or fully happy. And to accept new friendship pun a bit scary. Become defensive, hostile, cynical, cold towards others, always overwhelmed by the bitterness,  and et cetera. Prone to be overly sensitive, stubborn, pessimist, selalu rasa lonely and isolated. 

At the same times, hater carries the feeling of guilty over themselves for not to able to let go that feeling.



Overcoming hatred


Just to share few tips on how I overcome the hatred in me.

1. Access my hatred.. rational or irrational? if it is rational.. forgive them. If it is irrational forgive myself and forgive them as well.
2. Determine their genuine intention. Are they/ Is she/he doing it on purpose to mistreat me, to hurt me etc. If they doing it on purpose, forgive them/him/her. If it wasn't their intention, forgive them anyway.
3. Speak out my feeling. Tell them that they are hurting me.
4. Do some make over.
5. Walk out and walk off. Forget about them.
6.7. If none of the above worked... Go for retail therapy!






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